Aching Muscles: Day Two no iStuff

This morning I was awakened by the semi-whispering voice of my third child "Dad, can you ask Mom if we can have our iThings back yet?" To which Dad sleepily (and cowardly) responded "I'll ask her when she wakes up."  I lay quietly for a few more minutes knowing that if some of them were up, one of us had to be as well.  With no further indication that Geoff was intending to do so, I got up.  And my muscles ache.

I can't help but play at the park with the kids.  This might be weird - in fact, from my experience with parents at the park, apparently it is quite weird.  I get up on the equipment.  There are a few slides that are strangely shaped and I no longer snake in the same way the kids do, but I haven't hurt myself too badly since I figured out that there are some things I cannot do. 

When we play tag at the park, I have realized the dangers to someone of my height and inflexibility; through experience, a few bumps and bruises but no broken bones.  I cannot easily fit under the equipment without the risk of bashing my head.  Since I don't want to do that, ever, I don't go under it without a great deal of consideration. "Great deal of consideration" and "tag" are contradictory.  Therefore the answer is, in the words of Tow Mater, "to not to". 

This gives the little ... angels, quite an advantage over me even though I used to run track (back in junior high but I have this memory of being fast and so I figure I still am, or can be).   The only thing that scares me, aside from breaking bones on equipment that is not meant for a person of my size, is falling on this nasty new gravel that has replaced the sand of my own park days.


My preferred form of exercise.  By the look of this, you'd
think my arm muscles would be flexible enough...


Taking due precautions I find I cannot help but play.  My aching muscles have little to do with tag though.  Today they are due to my outrageous urge to do cartwheels.  A single cartwheel appears to stretch out muscles clear along one side of your body, from neck to calf.  I did them from both sides so as not to be unfair to my suddenly stretched out right side. Then I went on the 'monkey bars' (I have no clue if these are called something else in adult-speak). Not only did I get on the wretched things, but I stopped and pulled my body up two or three times (three could be an exaggeration) - just to see if I could. 

To anyone who has taken the time to maintain this flexibility or strength, this might sound ridiculously lame.  To the rest of the parents out there who watch their children play and run and climb on the equipment, you probably think I'm insane.  You're both right.  I feel like I should have taken care to keep myself in shape and the idea of using the park to test what parts of my body still work without an educated and knowledgeable personal trainer seems irresponsible.  But I can't help it.  And since I've been out there, doing this, my kids expect me to continue.

So here is a fair warning: if you want to be able to play without pain, you will need to take some precautions. I think it's called regular exercise (however I know a mother who does the exercise thing and when we were talking about my aches and pains from the monkey bars she looked at me funny and said "you actually got up there?"... but maybe she was just picturing my elongated body stiffly and awkwardly being hauled across the park; hadn't considered that one).  Or, if you cannot partake in the same enjoyment, perhaps you should just stay on the sidelines; it only takes one moment of insanity (doing it) to make you feel like a total ass (if you don't) when they ask the next time.