The Non-nomination For Mother of the Year Award

Yes, I am one of those Moms who hopes I do lots more right than wrong and that my kids do not end up being useless twits.  Today, that's the least of my worries because I, in one of my most un-intellectually stimulated moments to date, showed Hunter how to use a lighter.  Not down and out "put your finger here and do this" showed him, but he asked what it was and I told him it was a lighter.  He stared at me.  I said, "It makes fire." He stared at me.  I lit it.  His response? "Woah!! Can I try?!" And I was like "I am the biggest dumbass ever."

Now really, this is not the first time he's ever seen a lighter.  Nor is it the first time he's ever asked (Dad) to "make it fire".  However, this is the first time I've seen this response from him and I can't help but wonder when he's going to inadvertently burn our house down - because that's the other thing I saw light up in his eyes...

Okay, so that probably won't happen because we're fairly smart about not leaving lighters and matches around for the kids to play with.  Having almost burned my own house down at the tender age of five, I am well aware of what happens when you leave that stuff out.  I also keenly remember the ass-whooping I got when my own Mom discovered the lit candle under my bed and all the burn marks in the quilt since we'd been playing with it for a bit by the time we were busted.

The Mom Evolution - Appears I jumped the gun on stage 5

After that I was trying to get supper preparations finished, early, so we could go swimming for a bit this afternoon.  Suddenly there was screaming and the ever-anticipated sound "thump, thump, thump", followed by more screaming and crying.  Well Ethan's hands were tied and Aaron proceeded to pull Ethan down the stairs.  "How were you tied up?" I asked after everyone was calm. "Ocean did it!" Enter Ocean "Ethan tied my hands up and then he was like 'Okay! My turn' so I tied his hands!" I'm about to call Aaron out but he's prepped "Ethan threw a shoe at me!" While Hunter interjected here and there with "No, it was Aaron/Ethan/Ocean!"

Have I ever mentioned what the penalty is for pissing me off?  I make them play together.  A sit-down game at the kitchen table until they're nice to each other again.  So now we have to wait for that to finish so we can go swimming.  Well, at least my dinner is mostly prepped and I don't have much else to do other than hang out with Hunter.  Who just came in after that whole mess was sorted and said "So, Mom, what are you doin?" No worries, Hunter, I'm not doing anything that doesn't directly involve you.  Cheers Y'all.

Top Ten things I Love About the Fall

It all starts with back to school, but there's so much more than that!

10: Back To School Shopping - sure it's busy and you spend a small fortune between school supplies and clothes, but it's still kind of fun - reminds me of my own excitement for getting new clothes and supplies :)



pinterest via Jessica Scott

9: No Birthdays! Our family starts having birthdays in January, has a massive hit (with six in February) and then a few in March, a couple in April, one in May and three in June, two more in July and four more, including a biggie (Nana's) in August - Back to school means saving solely for Christmas. (That sounds kind of sucky but it's a good thing, trust me)

8: Fun Fall Occasions: There's Thanksgiving and Halloween, harvest colours - I love the fall!


7:Boots: I also love fall boots and cute fall jackets - I have way too many jackets and I miss them in the summer.

6: New TV to keep you warm on those chilly evenings - I barely watch it but I know it's an exciting time of year for the end of reruns and I do have a couple I'm looking forward to :)


http://fashionistatrends.com/fall-fashion-trends-september/

5: Turning the fireplace on: Also, love this about the fall!

4: Baking - I did some in the summer as well but it's just so hot! In the fall it feels homey!

3: Fall is my favourite time of year - I love the crisp air, the turning leaves - and above all, I have more sweaters than anything else and I prefer fall colours over any other so this is when my inner fashionista can finally shine :)

2: Schedule, Schedule, Schedule! As much as I had looked forward to not having a schedule, I am doubly looking forward to getting that back!

1: "Bouquets of sharpened pencils" You've Got Mail

The kids are getting bouncy, looking forward to seeing their friends they may or may not have been able to spend a little time with over the summer vacation and they are also looking forward to their new classes and new teachers :)

Oh My Sweet Wonderful Pre-Teen Daughter

You know those days, when you're completely off and the littlest, teeniest, tiniest things just make you incomprehensibly grumpier?  This was not one of those days.  In fact, not only was I productive today, my kids didn't fight, and Hunter fell asleep by 8:00 - everything was fine. 

Which is why, when Ocean was showing me the new outfit that her Nana just bought for her, and I saw the pants which had cutouts from the ankle up to mid-thigh... and I almost choked, turned to my Mom and said "Are those open? Can you see her skin??" "No" Mom assured me "you could if they were tight but they're not at all." (And if I'd told her that I'd seen a pair of those before, on a girl in my class who my Mom refused to ever let me hang out with she might have thought differently)... I took it well when Ocean said "I'm so wearing them to school" and then punctuated it with a lilting "Deal with it" as she walked away.  Funny thing.  My Mom would have screeched and grounded me on the spot for that kind of remark. However, from her only grand-daughter (and directed at me rather than her) my Mom laughed.   I have every intention of making those things disappear before school starts. Deal with that.

My mind was made up and everything was harmonious once more and the kids played until bed time.  Ocean met me in the hallway stating that she was off to bed - it was 8:45.  We talked for a few minutes and the phone rang - it was 9:00.  "That's (my friend)" she said "and Boom - I'm right." Okay I turned to leave and was headed back to the computer when she called me. "Mom, remember when you said (my friend) might be able to stay over tonight? Well can she?" "Ocean, it's nine o\clock at night" I said "and your Dad will be here in the morning to pick you up - make a plan for Sunday." She complained a little. "Sunday" I said firmly, "make a plan." And I closed the door. 

Within a few minutes I got a text from her. "Thanks Mom, now she hates me." By this time, my completely relaxed attitude was beginning to erode; fast.  "I doubt she hates you because I told you to make a plan. Why didn't we talk about this earlier today?" (I'd forgotten that she'd told me only minutes earlier that she was going to bed) "You said tomorrow or Sunday... I said tomorrow" She was right, I had said exactly that.  Patience waning. I wrote back "Then if it was already a plan, you wouldn't have had to ask but you did, so it wasn't.  Sunday or Monday, those are your options honey." (Kind of reminds you of "deal with it"?) "Whatever" was her reply.  Deep breath.

Ethan showed up shortly after complaining that Ocean knew where his iPod was and told him it would cost five dollars to get her to tell him.  Patience? What the hell is that???  I roar into the kitchen and grumpily reiterate what Ethan had told me and Ocean stares at me... then looks at Aaron... then the table... "Oh," she says smacking her hand against her forehead "I totally blanked; what was the question?" She's laughing, Aaron and Ethan are laughing and I've got a stupid smirk on my face.  And that was that.  My sweet, wonderful pre-teen daughter is relatively harmless... for now.

Well, Today is the Last Day

Today is my last day of paid work.  I had started to say "my last day of work" but if you've got four kids that is so not true.  And my kids are thrilled because they don't get it.  They think everything will be coming up roses because they won't have to go to a sitter and they'll have homemade treats every day.  Of course that last part is kind of my fault because I went on this massive baking spree right after graduation to make up for the fact that I hadn't baked anything since Christmas 2009.

I realize that obstacles are either barriers or opportunities to do something different in a glass half-empty or half-full mentality.  The other day when I was gathering some research materials (because that's what I learned to do and it would be incredibly stupid not to use it) for my evolving business idea, I grabbed a Law of Attraction magazine - though I'm not sure why because that has nothing to do with my business.... or maybe on some subconscious level it does.

In the first few pages I read about vision boards.  I have vision boards in my head but it's pretty chaotic in there and I'm thinking of making one that has actual density.  If you don't like the term "vision board" you could call it "planning" or "goal setting" or even "brainstorming".  In any case, it's not going to hurt to move that chaos into the realm of reality - like a to-do list with pictures for an eye-popping view of your future.  I've said it before, planning when you have children is more like a wish list in my house anyway and pictures just make everything better.

Of course, I also have a plan for the interim of being unemployed and business...less and I've come up with something I think is substantially possible. Because I don't have nearly enough kids of my own, I'm going to offer before and after school care.  Being that it's pretty much impossible to find here (and I know because I've looked!) I figure that might provide some much appreciated income.  Geoff suggested I make an ad that says "I'm staying home, so you don't have to" or "I don't have a job so I'll take your kids and you can keep yours".  He's such a smartass.

Even though I have a plan for continuing to get paid while I figure out my business, I'm well-versed in the whole "plans can change" predicament.  My children, however are optimistic about my joblessness.  Ocean says "yay! That means you can spend more time with us!"; Ethan concurs with the exact same sentence and Aaron said "good-ish?" Why? "Because we won't have to go to a babysitter - I hate that." Hunter?  Well I didn't expect a detailed oral report but upon hearing that I wasn't going to have to go to work anymore he said "so can we go to Grandma's?"

My brother-in-law's (still think it's neat to say that) birthday celebration is going on this evening and although I originally thought we wouldn't make it (because we pay sitters $10/hour and by tonight I will be officially unemployed), Nana has offered to come by after dinner and stay with the kids.  Things should be pretty calm by then because dinner doesn't start until 7.  And as I think about my last day of work... well I've come to the conclusion that I should have some fun.  All this mature planning crap can be tough and it's my brother-in-law's birthday; it would be totally self-centred to wallow in self-pity and not celebrate others' joy - in costume.  That's just common sense people.

Can't Wait to See Dad :) Poetic Injustice.

"Where's Hunter? Where's Hunter?" I call and I call,
Why are there NOT full length doors on fitting room stalls?
"Ethan? Where are you? Come try on these shoes!" and aisle after aisle there's no Ethan at all.
"Oh" says Ocean, "they went to the escalator". And I exit the store to stand in the hall.

"Hunter, stop running! Two more stores and we're done!"
"Ethan, do you like this?" "No, maybe that other one."
"Aaron try on each size." "Mom, this isn't any fun!"
"We'll do something tomorrow" I'm praying there'll be sun.

"Please watch your brother," I beg "he cannot leave the store!"
"I love this!" Squeals Ocean; "Can I please try on more?"
"In a minute" I tell her, "Hunter's headed for the door."
"Where's Hunter?" I ask Ethan. "Over there on the floor."

"Ok, these ones for gym shoes" chirps Ocean "but I need another pair too."
"Well can you find something here?" "Yeah, if you let me get the wedge running shoe."
"You're eleven and those are ridiculous, I am so not buying them for you!"
"Well my friend.." I don't care, one bit, what those other kids do!"

"Now where's Hunter?" He's under a shelf?  "Ugh, Hunter, gross, it's so dirty down there!"
"Ethan, do you have that hoodie?" I can't find that kid anywhere!
"Sigh" says Ocean, "what do you think of this shirt with my hair?"
Are you kidding right now, love - do I look like I care??

"Tough day?" Sales girl asks, reading my eyes.
"Can we go to Toys R Us?" and something in me dies.
"Maybe a shot of vodka?" She winks, obviously wise,
"Mom I'm hungry. Can we please have some fries?"

Forgot to grab cash and inevitably,
Each kid wants something different to eat.
Ocean goes first so I grab us a seat,
KFC, Taco Time, Arby's - how sweet!

"Where to now Mom?" She grins ear to ear;
"Hunter stay with me!" Where's Aaron? "Come here!"
Our steps are now hurried, the end, it is near,
"Ethan keep up; Hunter stay!" I now sneer.

"Stop hitting, no running!" They're driving me mad,
School's almost started, I will be so glad,
Behold the worst two hours I've ever had,
Can't wait to get home and leave you with Dad.

Apologies Are Best Served Unordered

Unordered does not seem like it should be a word but spellcheck is leaving it alone and it's the word I wanted so I will let it be.  If you've been following along, I've made a grand attempt at reorganizing my home so that I may enjoy some sort of organization in other areas of my life.  I've been lucky because everyone (who's been here) in my house seems to be on board.  Ocean and Ethan are coming back this afternoon but I don't see too many issues there - I've kept on the other boys, I can get Ethan too.

Aaron has been an absolute darling since he was able to play his game; so I don't really chalk it up to the fact that he likes the house now but it's still a remarkable improvement.  When I call him, for anything, he answers straight away.  When I ask him to do something, he does it.  And I've had to ask.  "Where does your hoodie belong?" He puts it away. "Where do your plates belong?" He puts them away.  I've said it before, I don't mind reminding them so long as they do it - and I've been getting it done without complaint.


Last night Hunter had taken a container of cereal into the living room (and Geoff was right there - not impressed) and spilled some on the floor.  I had to pause their movie to get it picked up but I did it. I'm becoming really adamant about that stuff now that the place is pre-tidy.  Geoff, obviously realizing his place in this moment, came over to do it and I told him not to and Hunter, seeing this, said "You pick it up Dad" (!! - Nana picked up after me, I picked up after my kids and it doesn't do any good - I'm speaking from experience here!).  Hunter did pick the stray pieces of cereal up - with his toes.  I said nothing because I don't care how you do it, just do it.  He eventually used his hands because he accidentally spilled the container twice while using his toes. Obviously, that cereal hit the trash but it was old anyway and I guess I'd forgotten it was in the cupboard. 

Every morning and night when Hunter takes off clothes I ask him where they go. "In the laundry basket" he says and puts them there.  He has no issues running around naked so sometimes I find the clothes in weird places: the hallway, the kitchen, on the stairs.  I call him and ask where his clothes go - and he puts them away.  I also try to get them to put shoes away to keep the entryway clear.  So far, so good.

This morning Hunter was snacking on Life cereal.  He had taken a fistful out and of course some dropped on the floor.  I was in the kitchen, had noticed this, and figured I would ask him to pick them up after I was finished with whatever I was doing.  Then he came in after a few minutes and said "I'm sorry Mom for mumble, mumble, mumble." I bent down. "What are you sorry for?" "I'm sorry for getting cereal on the floor" he said.  Well doesn't that just warm your heart! "You don't have to be sorry" I said with a hug and a smile,  "just come in and pick it up."  And he did.

The most amazing feeling in the world is when you see your kids doing something so well - and you know it's because of something you said or did.  I felt amazing when he apologized because he was not only aware of the fact that he had left the cereal on the floor, but also that he shouldn't have left it on the floor - that kid makes me think there's hope for all the boys.  And has also given me the motivation to continue with my housework today because before I put this all down, I didn't want to do a darned thing.  Now I'll go organize something because apparently, even the little guy appreciates it. :)

Momma-Me-A

Although I love the fact that G takes his Saturday chores seriously, I find it difficult to relax with all the movement.  I grew up with this too - my Nana was always "puttering".  Thank goodness for technology.  I prefer to "putter" online.

G is also a Sunday night power-tidy-upper; not that he's had to do that in two whole weeks.  And now he's asking me to get my grocery list together so we can meal plan.  Or get my meal plan so we can grocery shop.  In either case, it is obvious he thinks I am not supposed to be doing this.

Back to my story.  I come from a family of insanely pushy women.   I don't even mean that in the sense that they're overwhelming or nagging all the time (which they can be).  I mean that they push themselves. My Nana is going to be 82 in a couple of weeks and she's still rarely sitting.   We're thinking of getting her an iPad for her birthday - she'll sit more.

Nana has always dizzied me with her bustling; always busy, always working.  My Mom has had a horribly painful back problem for the past ten years but she still works, cleans and moves stuff that needs to be moved.   Yet both of them get on my case about "doing too much".  "You need to take a break" or "can we help with anything?" they would say.  Like it makes me feel so super capable if I have to call my 82 year old Nana to come give me a hand.

After one particularly annoying conversation with Nana that was something like the above but peppered with her telling me all the things she had accomplished that day, and how my Mom should be taking a break too, I had a lightbulb moment.  "Nana" I said with utmost firmness "you do realize that we get this from You?!" There was a short silence. "Get what from me?" She said with complete innocence.  "The taking on too much, the do it now, the I can do everything attitude!"  "Oh" she chuckled, "I guess."

Granted, this obviously hereditary issue didn't seem to hit me until about five years ago, but I've watched both my Mom and Nana deal with it my entire life.  G doesn't really seem to have it, yet he is the only person I know who can function at one hundred and ten percent on little to no sleep.  It's crazy.  Unfortunately, I don't think there's a cure for this problem and somehow all I've managed to do while writing this is create some weird anticipation of heading into my house and reorganizing my linen closet.  F. I really am becoming one of them.

Have a Little Faith Mom, Especially in Kids

Yesterday we went to the skate park.  Aaron has been interested in learning for a long time and finally got a board for his birthday this year.  He's been practicing his balance and he's definitely becoming more confident on it but we took his scooter instead because he has to keep one foot on the ground more often than not.  He actually got to go twice yesterday because my Mom took him after supper as well and that time he tried out his bike. 

Hunter didn't have anything to ride but he ran and ran and ran.  It was fairly quiet because we went over at 12:30 and my best guess is that the regular patrons (ahem) weren't out of bed yet.  At least, that would have been me at that age during summer holidays and I don't think much has changed.  There was only one other guy there, who drove over, and he practiced on his board.  It was helpful to see that he was practicing because we constantly have to remind Aaron that practice is what will help him get better.  My only complaint is that the guy didn't have a helmet - Mom.

Anyway, as I watched Aaron scoot along, I discovered the familiar, though not always welcome, feeling of "I want to do that too!"  I generally prefer to play rather than watch - except baseball.  I watched the Jays win the world series back in 1992 and I was on a baseball team once in grade five but as a general rule, it's the only game I cannot stand - bores me silly.  I can watch both football and hockey without an inkling of a desire to play either because I watch professional sports and well, as if I want to try and get into that mix.

Skateboarding though... well that looks like fun.  While we were there, aside from the one guy on a board, there was a couple of other boys who came over with their bikes.  They practiced in the ... uh, bowl? ... not up on lingo yet, but they did that (and I just Googled it - bowl it is).  So when Aaron finally decided to take a break, two hours later, he had seen both a boarder and some bikes.  When Mom took him back there later, he wanted to take his bike.

My only request was that he stay out of the "hole" (because I didn't think of bowl until this morning) and he agreed.  So Mom took him, thrilled to be the first one to let him use his bike there.  Now my Mom watches a lot of news.  The media can, and does, use shock value to get ratings - because that's what actually gets ratings.  We all know that bullying is a problem - if it's happening.  My Mom believes that every kid who is younger than eighteen is likely a bully. Check this out.

So Mom is walking the dog (her son, often referred to as mine and my sister's sibling but not accepted as such by either of us - he's not our dog) not far from the park but not exactly close either and notices that something had happened.  She had been "picking up dog (poo) at the time" but could see something was amiss.  Anyway, to her complete and total surprise, a bigger kid had gone straight over to Aaron (he had wiped out on the bike) and asked if he was okay.  This seemed perfectly reasonable to me but my Mom was shocked.And when she indicated as much, she says "Well you see it on the news all the time."

This is why I don't watch the news.  I know I need to keep up on things but that's why I have Twitter and why I have always preferred newspapers to network news: because I can read what I want to based on the headline.  The broadcasts are sensationalized due to the demand for ratings. Sure, there have been too many instances of bullying that the media blew up everyone's butts - but think about it - that's because kids helping out other kids on a daily basis doesn't bring the viewers in. 

Kids are not all bad.  Sure there's a few dipsticks out there, but there always was and there probably always will be.  I take my kids to the park to participate in their enjoyment, and be available in case something happened sure, but I don't expect something bad to happen.  I was scared of Scooby Doo type vans my entire childhood thanks to my Mom's irrational fear that inside each one lurked a child predator. 

Now I'm not saying that we don't have to make our children aware of potential dangers because that's going too far in the other direction.  What I am suggesting is that we talk with our kids.  "How was your day? How do you like your new friends? What do you do together? Do you know how to respond to a bully?" And choose our advice accordingly.  I'm no psychologist (as I've mentioned) but do you need to warn your kids to the point that they're scared of leaving the house?  No. Everyone is a stranger before they become a friend (or husband) - think how the human race would fare if we didn't recognize that.  Good people are lurking around every corner too.  We need to have some faith in humanity, most especially in kids. 

Oh My Gosh, What a Sunday!

Good morning, fabulous holiday Monday morning!  These are seriously my absolute, most favourite days - but this one feels even better than they usually do.  Why?  Because yesterday I was able to spend the whole day doing things I wanted to do.  Why?  Because I worked my tail off the whole week and there was NOT ONE pressing thing I had to do yesterday. 

There was one surprising small hot chocolate spill (gee, Hunter maybe?) but it was wiped up in a flash.  There was no laundry because I finished it on Saturday.  I swished and swiped in the bathrooms when I was in there but there was nothing dire.  People, I had a real day off! And now, on this glorious holiday Monday morning, I, once again, have nothing pressing aside from the blog.  I cannot tell you how much I am looking forward to my second day off!! 

My mom-and-dad-in-law are stopping by today on their way through town, and I'm ready.  We had no dinner dishes last night because we treated ourselves to dinner out.  Actually, that was more from a lack of planning because apparently no one wanted the ribs from the other night and I hadn't taken anything else out. Meh, it happens.

So we hopped in the car and headed out.  We actually don't do this often because Hunter can hardly sit at our own table for a prolonged period of time but once in a while, we try it anyway because he has to learn.  Well, I think I can say he's evolving, though I'm not sure if I'm proud of it or not.  Aaron of course is fine because he's seven.  However, as a baby, he would sit in his highchair at mealtime - he loved it.  Hunter hated it.  We shall see.

Anyway, Hunter is definitely not afraid to demand attention.  Most three-year-old's are not I guess, but this is the first time he demanded it of someone else to the point of minor embarrassment.  I suppose we can give the kid some credit for understanding the whole "server gets everything for you" idea.  We had ordered drinks and the kids' came in tiny kid cups.  They both opted for chocolate milk.  We were otherwise occupied I guess because not long after we heard the "sluuuuurp" as Hunter finished his.  Whoops. 

We didn't think much of it because dinner was definitely going to be a bit yet.  Aaron and I were doing his kid's sheet crossword and Geoff was reading a paper.  Hunter had been colouring as well but he got our, and the hostess' attention when he stood up and yelled "Scuse me! Can I have some more chocolate milk?" It wasn't busy in the restaurant so we only had red faces for the hostess.  We hushed Hunter but really, he got it right.  Why ask Mom and Dad?  They don't get the chocolate milk at the restaurant.

When our dinners arrived, Hunter looked at his plate of chicken fingers and fries with utter disappointment.  I noticed this and wasn't sure why - it's exactly what he ordered.  He was staring at it and Geoff, who was sitting beside him, saw why; a cup of sweet and sour sauce.  Hunter doesn't use it and apparently was unimpressed that something he hadn't asked for came with his meal.  We removed the offending cup and all was well.  We started eating and the server came by to ask how everything was.  It was great, thank you.  She was walking away and Hunter (who had not said anything at the time due to a full mouth) yells "I like mine too!" 

Now at the time, it was like, Oh my gosh Hunter! Stop yelling at them!  But having sat on it for a bit I've actually come to another conclusion.  Hunter was being a customer.  When no one came by to see if our drinks were okay, (and why would they? It had only been about eight minutes) he asked for one.  When she came by to see how our meals were, and most everyone does this, she only waited for our reply.  Hunter felt slighted.

Strangely enough, now, I'm proud of the little guy because he showed a real sign of getting bigger: his opinion matters.  He showed an understanding of the whole process and also that he wanted to be involved with it.  Pretty cool, little man, pretty cool.

It Started Out Well Enough...

When Hunter bounced out of his room all naked and sword fighting, I really did think it would be a good day.  For the most part it was actually.  Today I tackled Hunter's room and after some initial decluttering I came back in to see that he had ripped some stuffies out of their cubby holes and they were on the floor again.  Then it dawned on me - this is his room and his stuff. So I asked "Hunter, do you want those stuffies in your room?" He looked at them. "No, I really don't."  Lightbulb. "Okay, can you put what you don't want in your room into this bag?" "Sure" he said.  And he did.  His room has that much less stuff in it just because I thought to ask what he wanted. 

Organizational maven I am not, but I'm seriously working on it and I have to say that Aaron and Hunter have both been pretty darned helpful.  Even though I still have to remind them to clean their bowls and bring them from the table, I don't mind reminding them so long as they do it. 

I had a doctor's appointment today and even though I started Hunter's room with every intention of finishing it before I had to go, and I did, I was almost late.  No, I was late, but only by about four minutes.  I went and saw an otolaryngologist.  I am so not kidding about that ... specialization.  I asked the receptionist how to pronounce it and she said "Oh, you know I've only been here for five days but I need to learn that".  Great help.  Anyhow, the O-word can also be summed up with ear, nose and throat doctor.  This doctor gives the opposite of what a gastroenterologist (colonoscopy giver) does (at least you can sort of decipher that one - gastro- enter- ologist).  Bet you can't wait.

photo: emedicine.medscape.com
 

So there I am, in the chair and I've told him all about my issue and he has this thing in his hand that has a rubbery looking tail on it.  The part he's holding looks similar to a Wii remote only it's fatter and there are two buttons but no cross - much bigger than the image I found over there, but the hose thing looks right ish.  Anyhow, the tail is about the length of your arm from the elbow to the tip of your finger.  Nice huh?  So then he tells me that he's going to insert the tail through my nose and down into my throat.  As you can imagine, I'm super excited.

He tells me it doesn't hurt and that the worst case is that my eyes will water and he handed me some tissues.  They were almost completely melded together by the time we finished due to the pressure I exerted while they were in my hand..  So anyhow, there's no anesthetic or anything "We do this to four year olds" he says, like it's supposed to make me feel better thinking of a distraught parent holding down their four year old while the doctor inserts the tail through a little kid's nose.  But I'm a big girl and he'd closed the door so I gripped the arm of the chair and let him stick this thing into my nose.

He was right, it didn't hurt, but I've had more comfortable doctor's visits and I won't tell you what they did then.  So he looks through, takes pictures (because at the bottom of the tail is a camera) and then asks me to say "eeee" and I do that a few times and I notice I am no longer facing forward with my chin in, but have my head against the back of the chair and I'm looking down my right shoulder... it feels SO weird!  And then he says he's done.  He pulls it out and again there's no pain, it's just weird.

Afterwards, he shows me the video.  Nothing better than that, I think, though I can definitely imagine worse internal videos to see.  There's nothing wrong.  That's fabulous.  Hopefully I never have to get that done again.  However, he thinks I may have some acid reflux.  Fine.  "You should avoid coffee, greasy food and spicy food" he tells me.  Well that is like telling me I might not be able to breathe.  Oh, and alcohol as well as "tobacco".  And I thought, well, it's not like I eat tobacco...

So I got home and googled acid reflux to see what foods I should be avoiding. Ready?  Alcohol, fast foods, tomatoes, oranges, coffee, chocolate, pop, beef, cheese, spicy foods, garlic, salt and pepper, butter and two things that do not affect me in any way, mint and candy.

Needless to say I was pretty grumpy after I read that because it's SO MUCH BIGGER than that little list. No Chinese food, no tortillas or burritos, no pasta - because what the hell am I supposed to put on it??  I love spicy and I only recently started using salt because I was apparently deficient last time I got my blood work done.  Butter.  Seriously?? And no chocolate? I don't eat a lot of it but it's such a nice treat!  And of course the coffee - I love my coffee.  So very, very, very, very much.  I'm getting depressed again.

On the possible plus side, once the pills are done, maybe I can go back to drinking coffee.  And eating pasta with Alfredo sauce, which has both cheese and butter in it, because that is like my most favourite meal.   And almost every night, I sit down to watch something on TV with a glass of pop and a bag of chips.  Right before bed.  Okay, so I totally get how I could have developed this.

I've always said that if I ever needed to make lifestyle changes I would be totally hooped and here it is.  For the next month I'm supposed to avoid these foods.  I can make no promises that I will be able to deliver anything inspirational until I can have coffee.  This is only a marginally heartfelt apology right now because I'm mad again; Geoff has pop. 

Some Days

My sister took Aaron to a movie today, a belated birthday gift. She took him to lunch, he chose the movie, he changed his mind, she acquiesced, everything should have gone well.  Scratch that - everything did go well.  But my sister had told him that if the movie finished early enough that they would go back to her place and play some video games.  If you've been reading these regularly or happen to know us personally, you probably know what's coming; Aaron would rather have played video games at my sister's than anything else.

Not that he didn't enjoy himself, because he did.  What he took no concern in is the possibility that there might not be time to do both.  And he was miffed.  Not that you would have noticed until later.  We met up at Mom's place because my Aunt and Uncle were back for a night and we all had dinner there.  He was alright, seemed a bit tired, but otherwise fine.  After dinner my sister and her husband (just had to add emphasis because it's the first time I really could) left.  That's when it all went downhill.

Aaron didn't come to me with it of course because I have never been good at sympathizing with the loss of video game time.  He went to Geoff.  Now I'm not sure what started it or kept it going, but Aaron was in a super bad mood by the time we were ready to leave.  We packed up Hunter, and I do mean Hunter, not his things, and headed for the car.  Aaron dawdled and hid and was just being difficult. 

Geoff took Aaron in his car and I had no real idea until we got home (to our still tidy house!) what the problem was.  But I began to remember my conversation with my sister. Geoff drove up, he came in, I already had Hunter in the house - no Aaron.  Geoff brought the lawn chairs into the garage and asked if Aaron had come in.  No, he hadn't.  So we watched covertly while Aaron dawdled on the driveway... slowly nearing the front door.  Geoff went out.  Aaron ran away.   Geoff came back in.  "Man, he's stubborn! He's just like me!" "Uh-huh" I said as I walked by.  He is.

Then Aaron came up to the door, slowly turned the knob and peeked in.  He saw me first and I saw his smile but he held his head down and went into the garage.  I turned to Geoff and said "The light isn't on in there" and we waited.  Not quite a minute later the door opened and a hand came out against the wall, found the switch and flicked it on.  He stood with the door open so I was quiet.  Then it shut.  "He turned it on" I told Geoff.   And we waited.

Eventually he came in and made his way upstairs.  Geoff and I were both in the living room and Aaron flopped down on the ottoman and sighed.  I went to the kitchen.  Geoff was quiet.  Then Aaron asked what Geoff was doing.  And things were okay for a little bit.  I came out to write.  I thought I heard Geoff saying something in a frustrated tone and when he joined me I asked if they were scrapping. "Oh yeah" he grumbled.  "About what?" I asked, just to be sure; "Frickin' video games".

Now, once again, I'm faced with this: if he wanted to play the piano all the time would I be holding out?  Of course not - but maybe, depends on what that sounded like I guess.   It's not like he doesn't have any games.  He doesn't have the one that my sister has though.  Should she have spent the afternoon playing video games with him instead?  I have to wonder if that was like our idea of a "treat" being Chucky Cheese and the kids having way more fun at the park. 

At first he was all excited about the movie but once she mentioned the video game that he doesn't get to play all that often... well maybe they should have changed their plans.  He probably would have had a completely enjoyable afternoon.  Not that either of us thought of that.  I guess I will have to bring him out there one rainy day (because that's the only time he's allowed to play them during the summer) and let them play.  So we can both make up for it.  Yeesh.  And I'm going to go have a talk with my son and make sure he knows that Auntie Errin would have played games with him if she had known that's what he wanted to do.  Because that will make him feel better.

"Mom, can you teach me how to pick a lock?"

So obviously, when Aaron, who is seven, asked me this question, my first response was "Why do you want to know that?" and the answer... well, he said he wanted to know how to pick the lock in case he was ever locked out of the house.  So that's not so bad.  But he really wanted to know.  "Can you use a knife?" "No." "How about a pencil?" "No." Then again, I'm not MacGyver - maybe you can pick locks with both of those things.

I told him there are special tools for that.  He wanted to know where to get them.  "You can't just go out and buy them, they're for locksmiths, people who actually pick locks for a living." Well this admission got him interested.  "That's a job?" "Yes." "And they get to have the special tools?" "Yes." "Well what do they look like?" Holy crap. 

So I let him try it with a knife just so he could see that it wouldn't work.  Now I'm not especially worried that I'm assisting a future thief here, but at the same time, I encourage them to try to see how things work, with my supervision, and I wanted him to see why a knife wouldn't work (and save my locks from irreparable damage).  Again, at least I don't think it would work.  Geoff would have said I was giving him too much information.

Geoff gets me with that all the time.  Like when I told Ocean and Ethan how meth was made.  Not that I know this from personal experience, just memories from the news.  Geoff just sort of sat there with this look on his face that said "Really? You're telling the kids what meth is made out of?"  I saw no issue with that.  Who wants to take/smoke/inject ... sorry, I have no idea how people do meth, but who wants to take ammonia?  My kids don't want to take ammonia, so that's all good.

When I told Geoff later about Aaron's interest in the lock picking and why he told me wanted to know, Geoff says "Or he wants to pick the lock of the cupboard where the PS3 games are hidden." Ah.  Well that sounds pretty likely.  I didn't tell Geoff that I let Aaron try to pick a lock with a knife.  I'm not really sure if I've numbed the curiosity or if he will ask me to help him try to pick a lock with something else.  I like to think I'm the first person he'll ask when he wants to try again.  If he does ask, I won't tell him that his Dad has a theory about why he wants to know.  And I'll let him use a pencil.

No Mom, I Want to Stay at Grandma's!

Geoff and I attended another wedding celebration this weekend and Grandma, Geoff's mom, had the kids (my parents are the Nanas).  If you have a small child/children then you know how it is.  When you want to go have some adult time, your first call is to the people who love your children as much as you do - the grandparents.  Not only can you be fully assured that your children will be completely taken care of, safe and happy, but their rates cannot be beat.  It is an all-around win.

This morning, when I made my way upstairs to enjoy a wonderful pancake breakfast (another top notch benefit of being at Grandma's) I met Hunter first and offered him a smile and a "good morning".  The reply was enthusiastic, but not especially welcoming; "No Mom, I want to stay at Grandma's!" Seems the mere sight of me (but not Geoff, who was sitting right there) brought the realization that we would have to leave Grandma's house today.  Well happy to see you too little man!

I sat down at the table and dished my plate.  Eggs, bacon, sausage, toast, pancakes and, oh so thankfully, coffee.  Aaron poked his head around the corner and then pulled back again.  "Good morning Aaron" I tried with the next one.  "I'm waiting for Grandma" came his reply.  Oh for two I thought as I dug into my now comfort food/stress reduction breakfast. I did get my hug afterwards, but it was the initial reaction that got me. It must be said here that this delay in the morning hug only comes from these two - Ocean and Ethan greet me with a morning hug no matter where we are, first thing in the morning.  I have taken the following to heart, thanks to my sister, Errin.

I was talking with Errin one day about the difference between the first two, who only really had me for the first two to three years of their lives, and the second two who, due to geographic differences, had access to extended family from birth. Errin was telling me that the best way to bond with animals (that's her only experience yet) is to get only one at a time so they have only one "master".  Yes, I'm about to relate this to kids.

Not having been the only person in the lives of the last two, I have had difficulty adjusting to the fact that they have other people to go to.  Yeah, it basically sucks.  Even tonight, when Hunter was having his bath, he called me but Geoff followed and poked his head in the door as well. "Are you ready to get out?" I asked Hunter.  He sat there with his head down. Geoff walked away and Hunter looked up again "I just want Dad" he says.  Fine.  I turned around and told Geoff to come back and went back to my book. To me, this isn't normal - because my first two always want me!

Sure I think it's great that Aaron and Hunter have an absolute connection to Grandma and their Dad. I love how they're super excited when Dad gets home.  I love how their faces light up when we say we're heading to Grandma's house.  I love the fact that Geoff and I can have a night out and the kids could not care less that we're gone (read: no tantrums, no crying = no guilt). But I'd love it if they were more thrilled when we got back. 

And yes, I understand that there are marked differences with being at Grandma's house and being home.  They absolutely get their way a whole more with Grandma, and Grandma always has the most fantastic treats on hand.  That's what Grandmas are supposed to do.  Being a little Nana's girl myself, I remember it well.  I just had it so good with Ocean and Ethan minus the fact that I didn't take my first adult only vacation away from them until they were 8 and 7... and the fact that they all love to see Grandma is a great thing.  I just want my morning hugs.  Without complaint. But Aaron just came in and said "Mom, I want to learn how to pick a lock" so I've got other things to attend to now.

Disorganization Central

Well, after a busy day of tidying and reorganizing my closet (which was only necessary because my clothes were everywhere BUT) I: missed a doctor's appointment (mine) and fed the kids jam sandwiches because it was 5:30 and they were hungry and I had yet to start dinner.  Whoops.  So, since I have been thinking of this for awhile and in desperate need (and remembered there is a solution), I had to go back to square one. FlyLady.

FlyLady (www.flylady.net) is an email reminder to do your chores.  Not kidding.  I used this once before because I was so darned disorganized and it got me into shape with my cleaning habits without me even noticing.  Personal Testimonial: One night I was cleaning up and bustling away and I looked around and it was all done. I turned to Geoff and thanked him for helping.  He said "I didn't do anything." Not my proudest moment with him, but I was like WOW - I did it?  I set about doing it and it actually was completely finished?? Tidying up??? HURRAY!!! 

Well, even with this most truly ecstatic moment behind me, I somehow got the idea that I was all done with FlyLady and I stopped using it.  Over the past year or so, with the bigger house and Hunter too since I last used it, I've thought about FlyLady.  Well, today I am back on.  I have received my welcome letter and tomorrow I will wake up with the reminder to drink my water.  That is the only habit I actually kept but I'm also looking forward to tomorrow's challenge. 

Maybe it will be the bathroom, or the pantry.  Perhaps the entry way.  The thing is that it will only be one of them.  That and a fifteen minute de-clutter of something that really only requires fifteen minutes - set the timer and stop when it goes off.  What I always used to notice though is that I didn't stop until I was ready.  Which is probably how everything became so easy.  Point is, if I only want to do it bit by bit, or if I happen to have other things to do, I can stop.

I am excited.  Woohoo! FlyLady to the rescue!  And perfect timing too because my Aunt and Uncle will be back here next week and this time, I would like to invite them over to my house without the "OMG how am I ever going to tidy up before they get here?!"  Ah, that is a feeling of relief. Welcome back into my life, FlyLady.

What Is It I Do, Exactly?

That question was asked by Meg Ryan as Kathleen Kelly in You've Got Mail when she is afraid that her business, a bookstore, may be forced to close after a Fox Books Superstore opens nearby.  Once the inevitable closing takes place, Kathleen takes some sick days and some Ny-Quil like substance before she finally begins to consider what she will now do with her life.  A chapter has ended and another must begin.

So many stages of our lives are like this.  We are children then teens, then adults.  We are single, we are together, we are pregnant.  We have a baby, we have a toddler, we have a small child (possibly this stage gets stuck on repeat).  And then what?  We sit back and watch them grow?  Participating in their life moments until they determine the time is right for them to continue on their own? 

I only knew one absolute stay-at-home mom when I was growing up.  I'm sure she had many things to do but I remember my girlfriend telling me that her mom vacuumed every day.  I thought "Wow, that would suck!"  Perhaps there is some irony in the fact that I have to do this as well, but I have a toddler; my girlfriend was an only child and we were in our tweens at least.

I absolutely, never, ever, wanted to be a stay-at-home mom.  I did it when Ocean and Ethan were little; changing diapers, feeding, playing, cleaning... I was excited to go back to work.  I loved working even when I wasn't exceptionally thrilled with my job.  I felt like I did a good job.  Parenting, for me, was consistently full of self-doubt and over-thinking.  I could have driven myself mad. 

Then I had Aaron and I became a stay-at-home mom again.  This time it wasn't so bad.  I could take Ocean and Ethan to playschool.  Then I could take them to school.  I also had some stay-at-home mom friends so there was coffee and play-dates.  That became kind of boring.  Then I decided I would go back to school.  The hours were pretty good and I still worked, during school hours, so it was great. 

Now I've graduated and I'm a stay-at-home mom again.  For the past four years I have been working for myself essentially.  I am affiliated with and accountable to an office and supervisors and management, but I accept jobs that I can take and work when I am able.  I don't have the slightest clue how I would deal with an office job or the like.  And I no longer want to. 

I am at a stage where one chapter (school, and my job at the end of August here) has ended and another must begin.  Even though I am absolutely positive that I want to be home much more than a full-time gig will allow, I'm still not interested in the yucky parts of staying at home (read: laundry, dishes, organizing, cleaning etc.).  Haha, I want to be a Dad!  Kidding, though I could use his excellent organizational abilities.  Right now though, I sure don't envy Geoff.  He told me back in the day "I don't care how long school takes just so long as you can find a job after." Yes.  Well...

I love to write.  I want to write.  I'm scared of the fact that my book may take three years to write.  Actually, anything more than three months is too long; Student Aid repayment is looming... I have a business name, a business plan and a website that is under construction.  So far the expense has been minimal but there are expenses I should maybe be incurring and just haven't yet because of the whole expense thing requiring income to pay them with.   

Maybe I will have to get a job ("maybe" haha, like it's optional or something!).  Maybe it won't take as long as I think to finish my first draft and if a publisher likes it, maybe they will give me an advance on my advance.  I'm not sure how that works.  I guarantee I will find out - eventually.  Even I realize that, yet again, I have a lot on my plate.  Maybe I was born to be in the circus.  I still have one of the best damn juggling acts around [and I've never dropped a kid ;)] So why not throw in some flaming batons?  This seems completely reasonable to me because this is what I do, exactly.

(picture credit; ahem; www.theworstmother.com )

Hunter the Welcoming Committee

Does it ever make you wonder how all of your children can be so different?  I realize I'm not the norm if have to say "all" when referring to my offspring, but still.  Ocean was a shy child, Ethan was more outgoing in comparison and Aaron took after Ocean in cautiousness. Hunter? Well that kid seems to realize that saying "hi" to anyone often gets him the attention he is looking for. 

Hunter was waiting for Ocean to take him on a walk and a lady pulling a couple of little ones in a wagon passed by across the street.  Upon seeing her, Hunter stood up and yelled "Hi there!" She said "Hi" back and Hunter turned to me and said, "I liked seeing those kids."  He does this all the time.  We came back from somewhere one morning and saw a group of kids playing a few doors down.  As we parked Hunter piped up "I'm going to go say hi to those kids." And he did.  I followed along as well because that's just smart, and I met one of my neighbours.

I'm not especially shy but with a kid like Hunter, you meet everyone and anyone because he's interested in meeting them.  Sometimes people don't respond and Hunter will just look at me with surprise and say "They didn't say hi!" I think it's kind of cool that he expects a response but especially that a lack of one doesn't stop him from chatting up the next person.  And although Hunter has no issues chatting up kids, he is especially engaging with adults which is both a blessing and a curse.

I am generally not opposed to chatting with strangers but sometimes I'm just not in the mood to be congenial.  Kids have lightning quick emotions whereas it takes me more than a second to move from grumpy to super happy (because I'm not nearly as prone to ADD as they are).  After I've had a tough morning cleaning up spills and refolding laundry that was already folded the night before and trying to get breakfast cleaned up and everyone is bounding off the walls because they need some outside time, I am not always as welcoming to the "oh, what a sweetheart" because I'd love to reply with some smartass remark like "Yeah? He's yours" and walk away.

Phew.  Even that made me feel much better.  I'll never give him to a total stranger and I will always play at the park because it feels good to play, even when I don't much feel like it.  I'm also glad he's not a brooding kid and that he likes to talk to people.  Some days though, I find it hard to take the compliments and the smiles when I would rather be at home locked away in a closet.  I think the following sums it up completely: "Insanity is hereditary; you get it from your kids."

 

It's Really About the Shoes

I'm a day behind in my head as well as my blog, even though I posted yesterday.  In an attempt to get both of these back on track, I'm hoping it will help if I make today's segment "the rest of the story". 

I'm not in great shape.  This is usually difficult for people to understand because I'm thin.  Not skinny, mind you, just thin.  It's all in my genes.  My muscles hurt fairly regularly because I'm not in great shape.  Last Thursday, I decided I needed to get this whole exercise thing on the go. I did a session of Belly Dance and about a half hour of pilates. With that being said, I was in terrible pain the whole weekend at my sister's wedding event.

On Sunday morning, the day after the wedding, I woke up feeling especially ill.  At one point I asked my mom if I actually smelled of alcohol because that's all I could smell.  As it turned out, I did not but that sure didn't help the smell go away.  Everything takes longer when you feel like that.  It doesn't help if you have more to do either.  Hunter had stayed with his other Grandma just because there was to be too much of a demand on everyone else if he came with us asI was in the wedding party. So on our way home from Golden, we had to meet Grandma halfway (thankfully it was halfway) between our house and hers which added on an additional two hours to our trip (could have been four). 

By the time we got home, the kids were pretty desperate to get out of the car and I was in dire need of sleep.  I managed to get everyone down at a semi-reasonable time and managed to sleep.  I woke up on Monday still fuzzy, but definitely better.  I tidied up the kitchen, made coffee, and headed to my spot to turn on the computer.  Something nudged at the back of my mind then.  Something, what was it? It was 8:52 am.  CRAP I have to work at 10:00!!

I scrambled into the house, started waking up kids, called Nanas to remind them about the impending drop-off and hopped into the shower.  I grabbed bags of cereal and tried to ensure they were all dressed (Ethan forgot shoes - who forgets shoes???) I dropped them off without taking a moment to say hi and called my contact - I was going to be at least ten minutes late.  Turns out that was no problem, I only had to be there for 10:30.  Fine, at least she wasn't upset and now I didn't have to worry about the whole speeding thing. 

I arrived, I presented, I kicked ass.  I'm old hat.  The contact and I talked about the August date and I left.  It's a secure building and it was lunch time.  I got to my car and fiddled for my sunglasses.  Nope.  I called the contact back but they were on lunch and I needed them to actually come down to get me.  I wasn't about to sit in my car for the next hour and wait for them to get the message so I said I would pick them up in August.  Yay.  Then I pulled out and realized I didn't have my coffee either.  Nice.  It's my U of C mug too.  I look forward to having that again in August.

I headed back to Nanas house and my Aunt and Uncle were just having lunch before they headed further east.  I tried to have a conversation with them but Mom was on the hunt for one of Hunter's shoes.  He wore mismatched ones anyway because we couldn't find one of either pair before we left the house.  Now he'd lost another.  I guess.  Geoff just bought him a new pair as well, which we couldn't find at all.  When we looked later though, I could only find one.  WHO DOES THAT?!  He has like eight pairs of shoes and I can't find ONE match??? GAH!

I had to get the kids out of the house because they were grumpy from being woken up and could have used a nap.  Not that they had a nap.  They played outside, there was some bike-riding and a park trip. Although Hunter couldn't make the park trip as this was when we discovered that we could only find one shoe out of his newest pair.  We went to sleep and woke up.  Well, I did anyway.  The kids are still having some difficulty with the morning thing. 

On the up side, Geoff just informed me that he won a framed Lanny McDonald single and 1989 group photo of the Calgary Flames Stanley Cup win in a silent auction.  Great.  Cannot wait to tell him that Hunter also needs more shoes.

Kid Time and Adult Time

Right now, I'm sitting in a hot tub (feet only, I don't do bathing suits) and Ocean, Ethan and Aaron are with me. So are five other adults, none of whom have children or are related to us.  

This is not a situation I usually put myself in.  Normally I have kid time and adult time and I do not mix them because I find I can't.  I'm either Mom or I'm just me - I haven't had much practice being both.  Not that I expect there's a huge difference, this actually stems from responsibility. 

If it's only me I have to be responsible for, I'm much more relaxed.  I'm not worried about what everyone else is saying or what (within reason) my children are doing.  I find social situations stressful with them because I worry about their manners and what they're hearing and seeing and saying.... But tonight is proving to be reasonably fine.

I know people who have brought their children into adult environments and it never sat well with me. Maybe it's the type of situation. So far as I can tell, we haven't really alienated anyone.  The kids have only needed a few reminders to take others' needs into consideration.  Maybe the time is right.

They are older now, and maybe they are ready to see what their behaviour should be, and the beat way to learn is often by doing.  It's a learning experience, and as usual, for them as well as me.

Two Days Until I Have a Mrsister

That is a Mrs. Sister.  My sister is getting married in two days and it has been a long time coming.  Her friends began referring to her engagement as separate from other people's engagements.  "Are you going to have a normal engagement period or a C/E engagement?" It really hasn't been that long - to me anyway, but I'm still married, so that's why nothing seems that long to me.

They went to high school together but hung out in different crowds.  They knew who the other was but that was all.  They found out that they had both toured Australia at the same time, though they did not run into each other.  One day a mutual friend thought they should meet.  And the rest is truly history. 

My sister is six years younger than I am and I moved out when she was 12.  I remember tying her up one day after school because she was getting on my nerves.  She used to answer our private line and when the person on the other line (I'll give her the benefit of the doubt and say it was dependent on the friend) would ask if I was there, she would say "Yes" and hang up the phone. 

Our Uncle Jack called her "Ayatollah Gretzky".  He and my mom used to joke that when she got mad she would jump six feet in the air.  She was spirited to say the least.  She still is, and I wouldn't want to be on her bad side, but I think she's found other outlets. 

She's travelled the world.  Aside from Australia, she's spent time in the U.K., Ireland, Spain, travelled across Canada, Mexico, various states, South America and Antarctica.  She makes friends wherever she goes and keeps them.  She is amazing.

And soon, very soon, they are going to start trying for children.  I cannot wait.  She tells me about how her friends bring their kids to social events and they are so very well behaved and they sleep anywhere.  She called once and said "We're going for dinner, if you want to come." Hey that sounds fun, I think, so I ask "When?" "Well, now" was the reply.  Oh yes, I cannot wait. 

The best thing, I think, is being a sideliner in this sort of thing.  She once thought my little Ocean was kind of mouthy.  And she is; she is me.  My sister will have at least a part of herself.  Which is only fair because her namesake, my Aaron, is her too.  So if I got lucky enough to have two of her in my life, she should be graced with at least one.  To my sister; my little sister whom I love, congratulations on your next big step in life.  I seriously cannot wait.

Project Number Two: Pitting the Children Against One Another

It sounds bad, but I hope it won't be.  My kids like money.  They earn their allowances and they like to make more money however they can.  They've been slipping a little over the summer though.  I guess since Aaron is currently working on his behaviours for his other project, I didn't really notice this while Ocean and Ethan were gone.  But they're back and I notice now.   I have to go to the dollar store and pick up three "banks" with locks.  I have a feeling this will work better if they can "see" their money and also see it moving between banks - because it will.

So, project number two is under way.  Here are the rules:

1. Each child will start out with $40 in their "bank".
2. Whenever one child notices that another child has neglected to:
• remove dishes from the table
• tidy up toys/games/books from common area
• take laundry down and put away
• do something else that was asked of them
• is disrespectful
• The observant child gets $1 from the offending child's bank

There is something for everyone in here. Ethan is often forgetful but he is the least likely to bug the crap out of the others so his plus and minus will probably keep him in the game. Aaron is not very forgetful about most things but he's a little bug.  Little things like turning off the TV while someone else is watching it if they won't turn the channel or something like that.  Ocean can probably whip the other two in staying tidy but she can be a horrible bug, which I've told her can be disrespectful to others if they are taking it badly.  Again, it should work out fairly even. 

All three of them are super excited about the chance to earn a possible $120.  I'm even feeling just a little guilty about the fact that the odds are not in anyone's favour to actually do so.  The last one will be the best to keep everyone even (which is why it's there).   At the end of the day, I've offered to give them $120.  Why?

While each of them have certain strengths it is my never-ending hope that they will manage to curb their weaknesses.  What do I get out of it?  To begin with, they're offered an allowance and it costs the same except I get little return because the system is flawed.  Some of them consider earning an allowance to be optional.  Second, I get at least one extra set of eyes.  They will each have to be proactive with this because getting caught by one of the others, and having to "give" them money will not sit well with anyone.  Lastly, because I fully expect them to realize that the possibility of earning way more than they would earn in allowance is never really going to happen because it's rigged... well, maybe I'll manage to remove their urge to gamble later in life too.  Two birds.